As I continue to grow and to practice what I preach to my students and to my own sons, the more I’m convinced that we see what we want to see and what we have been conditioned to see, even if it’s unpleasant.
We’re unconsciously looking for more of what we’re accustomed to seeing. Sometimes we can even hear ourselves perpetuating our circumstances and emotions. “Oh my gosh! I have the worst luck!” or “How come I can’t just meet a guy who isn’t a jerk?” These thoughts and our self-talk help us to justify our current life circumstances. We repeat it. Then…we share it. We manifest it, and bring more of into our lives.
But what if, instead of doing that unconsciously, we consciously looked for something different, something better? What if we made an effort to see the good in people, to see the service, to appreciate the perseverance of the amazing people who surround us every day…then we shared that? Wouldn’t we, in turn, unconsciously start to see and share more and more of that? More and more of the good?
If we all tried, if we made it our homework…our responsibility…couldn’t we find the good, the love, and the inspiration so frequently that we stop empowering the bad? Couldn’t we be so relentless in our awareness of the good that the bad and the ugly no longer have room to flourish? I think we can. I think I have.
While out for a run I came across a massive, refrigerator-sized cardboard box that someone had discarded in the middle of a busy suburban street. Initially I felt a little twinge of anger, disappointment, and I even felt disrespected. It’s my neighborhood. Then, as I ran closer to it to pull it to the side of the road, that twinge turned into a twinkle. As I got closer all I could see was what I try to see all the time…in everything and in everyone.
I saw love.
In fact, it was literally cut by an industrial machine right into the side of this massive chunk of garbage. Yeah, I’m sure that engineers designed it as a handle, but I saw something else… because it’s what I want to see, because it’s what I look for.
Years ago, I’d have held onto that disappointing feeling and let it nag at me for a bit. I probably would have asked a neighbor, “Did you see that big box in the middle of the road? What the heck? How could somebody…blah blah blah.” Sharing the negative. But I’ve trained myself and broken that bad, seemingly innate habit. Now, I hold onto love. I hold onto the good that I see…I share that. In fact, I try to only share that…and I let it crowd out the bad and the ugly.
It takes practice to recognize the negativity that stealthily creeps into us while we’re unaware. We just need to become aware. That ugly feeling isn’t pleasant, so recognize it as a sign, a message to yourself to look for something something else; something good.
Look for love, and if you can’t find it…create it, then leave it for someone else to find.
I hope today brings you love. Actually…I hope that you see the love that today already brought, then I hope you share it.