“We need much less than we think we need.” ~ Maya Angelou
Just a few nights ago, after a day filled with unusual and uncomfortable worries and other negative emotions, I found the ground again…or should I say that I was graciously but directly reintroduced to the ground. Grounded by someone’s thoughts, words, grace, and wisdom.
My good lady and I have an uncommon relationship. Due to our life circumstances it’s not uncommon for our closest moments, our richest moments, to be completely spontaneous. One recent Thursday night we went for a walk around the neighborhood just before bedtime. It’s our private time and ironically our private space to listen, to learn, and to share. On this particular night it was raining. So, did we go for a walk? Of course we did! It was the only time and place we had to just be…and to be with each other.
I shared with her some of my recent worries (I don’t often worry). I shared a bit of my discouraged spirit and my less than certain perspective (I’m rarely if ever discouraged). But this place? This emotion? It was where I was, and in that moment she was happy to listen. I expressed to her that I wasn’t sharing my thoughts and ideas and worries to simply vent or as some sort of exercise in rhetoric. I truly wanted to hand these thoughts to her and ask for her help in untangling them before she handed them back.
I was feeling like I was spinning my wheels. My dreams are so clear. My effort so sincere. Jessica and I have a vision. We each do and we both do. Much of what we want, what we wish for, what we are passionately working towards overlaps with the other’s wants and wishes and work. It’s a beautiful synergy. We want to help people; the curious; learners of all types and ages and backgrounds. We want to fill in the gaps in their social, emotional, financial, spiritual, physical development. Gaps oddly omitted from a lifetime filled with churches, and publicly funded schools and social programs and activities.
Personally, to do my best to affect change, I’m writing. I’m speaking. I’m sharing my vision with the universe, with God, with people who may have the means to open doors or even help guide me, or even better…help guide us! We are seeing people moved by our words and our actions, touched and drawn toward what we’re creating. Moved by our love. But the progress is dreadfully slow.
After sharing my confusion; after patiently waiting…she pointed out that maybe the progress isn’t slow at all. Maybe it’s perfect. Maybe I’m just being impatient. The humbling nature of her comment wasn’t comfortable, but it was exactly what I needed. The pause. The acceptance. The perspective. The vision. The space. The breath. Maybe I am the Bertha Flowers to the next generation of Maya Angelou’s.
Mrs. Flowers was the mentor, the coach, the persistent love who cared and nurtured and in my opinion rescued Maya Angelou and brought her back from the debilitating experience.
Maybe I am not going to be the oak tree, but instead I’ll be the soil that has to be ready, through all four seasons, to nurture and support and love the next generation of oaks.
I’m still reminded of a beautiful perspective that Jay Shetty shared in the book, “Think Like a Monk.” He said, “Be the salt.” Never the star, but always in support of the true stars. When a meal is amazing, make the ingredients that shine. When a meal is bland and boring and misses the mark, it’s OK. Let it be the seasoning; be the salt. Encourage those around you to shine. Lift them up. Instill esteem and confidence and strength, and nurture their passions. Ikigai! (a Japanese concept that combines the terms iki, meaning “alive” or “life,” and gai, meaning “benefit” or “worth.”) If things are off the mark, humbly take responsibility for it. Be humble and be accountable. Be willing. Of course, it’s not a perfectly cut and dried analogy, but to me it’s a beautiful idea that fosters humility and connection.
Yeah! Someday I dream of being that star. I dream of walking on the red carpet, a successful author and screenplay writer, weaving the lessons of life and the universe through stories of inspiration. But like everything…I’ll do the red carpet differently. I’ll step out of my Hyundai, with a kayak on the roof and a guitar in the back, dripping salt water from my thrift-shop suit, pants rolled up, no shoes…holding the hand of the girl I love. Her hair and outfit are soaking wet from the sea, as she flings her stilettos over the wall just in time for photos. The flashbulbs burst. We smile at the cameras, then at each other just long enough to see the beginning of happy tears. Then, we turn and run back to the car, barefoot, hand in hand, to go find the best tacos in town. That’s what I see.
If, however, that doesn’t happen; if that isn’t to be…I will feel peaceful and fulfilled and happy being Mr. Flowers for as many Maya Angelou’s as I meet.
How lucky am I?
Harvesting Insights 